Its getting close now, isn’t it? Christmas is almost here. We’re close to the end of the year, the end of the decade. How are you doing? Because it’s been a traumatic time in the world and I’m sure there’s plenty more of that to come.
But for now, pause, slow down, forget the 24 hour news cycle, the internet, social media and all the notifications and pushes and buzzes clamouring for your attention. Be still, just for a moment, and focus on you, go inside and take your emotional temperature, how are you feeling? are you doing okay right now?
This is a tough time for many people and there are as many different reasons for it as there are people who will experience difficulty. Money issues, family issues, relationship woes, a bleak outlook for the upcoming holiday, a worse one for the incoming year and maybe a combination of any and all of these and more besides.
How do you stay sane? Well, I’d first like to ask who thinks any of us are sane anyway?
But we’re all here, showing up every day, doing what we need to do to get by when we can, getting on with things, keeping our heads down, trying not to attract attention because attention can sting, staying small, hiding in plain sight.
What the F*ck are you doing? This is not who you are. This is not why you’re here. This is not YOU!
How do I know? You might say you’re a quiet person. But there’s a difference, a huge difference between being a quiet person and playing small, and you know it because you feel it.
Even the quietest, most introverted person likes to be seen for who they are, likes to have their contribution acknowledged, their gifts, skills and talent and beingness appreciated.
Playing small is hiding from yourself more than other people. Hiding from the past that is still happening in your mind. Trying not to attract attention, not because you don’t want attention but because you don’t want to draw attention to this version of you, this role you’re playing, the part you’ve acquired to hide behind.
When we are truly ourselves, when we are truly loving and appreciative of the unique, special, brilliant person we are, we like getting attention for it. Not necessarily a showy ‘Oh, look at you’ kind of thing, more a nod, a ‘I see you and I like how you’re showing up in the world’ notice and appreciation.
How are you showing up in the world? Are you totally being yourself? Not holding anything back, not trying not to be ‘too much’ of something?
When you are being truly you, that’s who you are and you’ll feel it. Undeniable! Whether you are the shoutiest person on a stage or the quietest person stood by the door, you shine brightly. People see you and know who you are and connect with you because you are being you all the way to the depths of your soul.
Its hard to be that honest, that true and that free (yes, being yourself is the most freeing thing you can be!) when you were brought up to think that who you are is wrong. That just being you isn’t enough. Not good enough, not smart enough, not pretty enough, not interesting enough, just not enough of anything at all.
And whose f*cking standard was that? Did it come from someone whose opinion you would trust on your children today? Did it come from a person who knew your true value at all?
When you think about it, getting past all the deep indoctrination of those often repeated lies, you can realise just how false that narrative is. How flawed their judgement. How wrong. You can feel its wrongness in your belly, in the marrow of your bones, in your very soul. They were wrong about you. Totally wrong. Dead wrong. Could not have been more wrong.
You are so enough. Sooo enough. You have so much of you, more than anyone knows, all the you-ness you need because that true you is infinite and perfect in all ways, even in your imperfections you are perfect and perfectly enough. You have enough of everything you need to be the amazing, fabulous, capable person you know yourself to be.
You have been hypnotised into believing other people’s crap. You’ve bought into their insecurities, fears and perversions. Its long past time for you to come out of that trance of negative poison and live from the truth of who you really are.
Utterly Brilliant. Utterly Beautiful. Utterly Fantastic.
Beyond comparison, No-one else like you exists.
Truly. Almost 8 billion people on this tiny planet and there’s no-one else like you.
Its time to start loving yourself. To love yourself from the inside out, the upside and downside, emotional, physical, mental, spiritual. Every cell in your body, every aspect of your being. What you call good, what you label as bad, what you have heartbreakingly marked as ugly. Time to love all of you.
You are being called home and home is love, true, deep and abiding self love.
Home is that feeling of peace deep inside, that warm, tingling feeling you get when you feel most you, safe, happy, loved, loving and on the right track in life.
Yes, circumstances can be trying, difficult, even dangerous. But if you can allow yourself to connect to yourself in a real way, to feel like home just by taking a moment to commune with your inner wisdom, those circumstances become irrelevant because you know who you are and you are home.
The shift starts inside. See yourself how you want to be and treat yourself that way. Live from that truth. Because you are the person you decide to be.
Don’t let people who couldn’t see your true magnificence and worth dictate your value, don’t allow them to have the final say in your self belief.
Unhypnotise yourself. Break out of that trance of negativity and return home. Return to you.
And if you’re stuck, if you crave going home but the restrictions on your thinking have been planted too deep and you can’t break yourself free? If you feel too lost to find your way back to reconnect, get in touch and I’ll show you how to find your way home.
My Change for Life client programmed is designed to do just that.
This blog post could help too http://cynthiacurry.uk/the-school-of-unlearning-or-how-to-leave-the-past-behind-and-start-over-free-from-that-sht/
And try journalling some answers to the questions asked here http://cynthiacurry.uk/break-down-your-walls-and-open-your-heart/