You always know and when you’ve forgotten you know, you can always remember.

Apologies for not writing to you yesterday, but I was doing something that I used to take for granted pre LockDown and Coronavirus. After almost 6 months without it and things were getting unbearable, I got my hair done!

Wow. What a strange world we’re living in when something so mundane and ordinary is now so important and critical. I also got my colour done, which meant I was 3 hours in the hairdressers chair and I hate that.

I hate lots of things about it, the break from my routine, I hate being so long in place where I can’t just get up and leave because I’ve got a head full of foils and I hate the polite small talk.

And in many ways it was so much worse than a pre-Covid 19 hair appointment. I hated wearing a mask while the women were working on my hair and the mask was on for over half the time.

And one thing I did differently this time, something I’ve never done before was I shut my eyes and did not engage in the small talk. Not in a rude way, but in a ‘I’m wearing a mask and finding a way to deal with it’ attitude. And I meditated almost the whole time I was there and the hairdressers mostly operated in silence.

At one time, they apologetically asked me if I was okay and if they were being rude because they weren’t used to not chattering while working on someone. And I’m right back to them with ‘No this is what I want, thank you, I’m going to meditate and go into other worlds and it’s exactly what I want to do.’

And they respected that and even when they talked amongst themselves, I was easily able to tune them out and slide into trance and so, whilst I missed my journaling, my writing for the blog and my new personal meditation technique that I do at home each morning, I managed to get some peace and grounding while the essential work of making my hair fit for company and less annoying to me was done.

I really want to talk about my new meditation technique because I’m finding it so powerful and it shows how I’d forgotten what I know and how I found my way back to it through spiritual/universal nudges.

A while back, just as Lockdown started I bought one of those Shakti meditation mats  that seem to be advertised everywhere right now. I used it a couple of times, thought it was a good experience and could be potentially beneficial and promptly forgot all about it.

Then last week, a video memory popped up on Facebook from 5 years ago and watching it, I heard myself choking and remembered how ill I’d been back then.

Hashimoto’s Disease, a hypothyroid autoimmune condition that was threatening my life. I couldn’t eat without choking, a deep breath had me choking, my energy levels were flatter than the battery in a twenty year old abandoned car. I was on my knees, praying for help to feel better.

And so I went through the Transcendental Meditation course and started the 20 minute morning and afternoon discipline that adherents of this process devote themselves to, and that along with a 5 day fast kickstarted me back on the road to health.

But sometime, I’ve no idea when, a year or two later, probably when I started feeling better, I stopped meditating. We all do that don’t we, its like we say to ourselves ‘okay, this is great, I’m starting to feel better, that’s enough don’t want to feel too good, don;t want to go all the way to feeling amazing.’ Right?

It worked, I’m feeling somewhat better so I’ll stop doing it now.

And I know I’m not alone in this. Friends, clients, mentors, coaches – all have agreed with me when I make this observation.

I remember when I first learned EFT/Tapping, way back in 2006 and I was blown away by how it made me feel, how it helped me move through and process emotions and for several years I tapped every single day. Until I stopped. And now I hardly ever tap unless I’ve signed up to a programme with a specific mentor who uses that tool.

I’m sure you have your own stories of all the tools you’ve accumulated over the years, the healthy ones and the dysfunctional ones, because we tend to collect both. And of the healthy ones you have, which are you using regularly? Do you even remember what you have in your tool box? We can remember the unhealthy stuff so easily but the healthy tools, not so much. But here’s the thing, you do know its there, you’ve just forgotten you know.

And that short video that ended with me choking reminded me how incredibly beneficial meditation is for me and meditation is one of the things I keep saying I want to create time for every day. (and never do!)

I decided to anchor the habit to something I always do automatically every day – I’ll talk about how to do that another day – and so, after I vacuum I now lay out my shakti mat.

And after I’ve written my journal but before I write my blog, I go lay down on the mat and meditate.

And the habit is now set and I don’t even have to think about how/when to remember to do it. Its automatic.

And my meditation has changed over time and while I still start with the TM mantra and allow myself to get into the starting trance state with it, I also use self hypnosis to take me deeper and let go and release tension even more.

Then I’ll dialogue with my subconscious mind, asking for responses to specific enquiries framed as yes/no questions related to how I’m feeling that day, what’s going on and what I need to do, seeking guidance and affirmation I’m on the right track.

I open up my intuition, I deepen my connection with Source and I release even more and go deeper and deeper.

And this is where I’ve now found the Shakti mat to be invaluable. At the start, my mind will be whirling sometimes, and I’m chasing these thoughst around in my head like I have a broom and I’m attempting to thwack them out of existence. I’m all up in my mindspace and that’s not working to bring me into a meditative state,

The discomfort of the spikes of the Shakti mat brings me back into my body and as I soften into the pain, my body relaxes even more and I go deeper into that beautiful altered state of consciousness. I’ve found it to be another invaluable tool to help me let go of tension in my mind and body.

And for months after I bought it, I’d left it hanging on a hook in the cloak room!

Even worse, I’d forgotten how good for me meditation is.

Yes, I would do it over the years, but sporadically, only every now and then and we all know that it is the consistency in daily practice that makes a difference to our wellbeing. Consistency is the key in achieving anything in life.

Now and again doesn’t cut it and I deserve better from myself.

And this is where Loving Yourself First comes in. Its easy to dismiss the need to care for ourselves, to say I’m too busy, or I don’t feel like it today but the effort it takes to do the thing is always tiny compared to the feeling of uplifted accomplishment and self appreciation and pleasure we get when we just settle ourselves to doing the damn thing and getting it done.

You know what you need to do for you to make your life better, to make you feel happier and more fulfilled.

You already know, you’ve just forgotten. That’s all.

Take this as a reminder and go dig that thing that works for you out of your toolkit and commit to doing it, commit to doing it for yourself. Commit to you.

In hypnosis, I help you do what you already know you want to do. You always already know what you need to do to get from where you are to where you want to be. Get over your avoidance and resistance, Let go of your fear. Do whatever it is. Do it today.

And do it every day, and watch how quickly you start to feel better about yourself.

Because Loving Yourself Comes First.

And of course, my hair looks great, more importantly I don’t feel like a hedge witch anymore 🙂


Cynthia xx

PS. Loving Yourself Comes First, the programme I’ve been promising for nearly two years! Yikes! I’ve finally gotten out of my own damn way and started creating it for you and its glorious. 24 hours to complete self love, a total, wholesome immersion in self-appreciation, gratitude and joy. Interested? You should be because this is epic! I promise. Coming soon! Message me if you want more details.

And in the meantime, if you need help, get in touch for personal tailored HypnoTherapyCoaching. Because you being all of you and loving yourself and your life is what the whole world needs.See more here.

Change for Life with HypnoTherapyCoaching, Reconnect to Your True Self




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