Does that fantasy you’re indulging in really do any harm?

We’ve all done it: Winning the Lottery is a favourite one for many of us. Or meeting and marrying a billionaire is some people’s indulgent fantasy. Being spotted by a talent scout for your particular passion or sport. Or just simply having that person fall in love with you regardless that they’ve never shown any interest in you before or they’ve told you its over.

But so what? Its harmless isn’t it?

Well, yes and no.

Visualising a goal as though its already happened is a great primer for your subconscious mind and it helps create the right thinking which create the right actions to make it happen. Which is part of what RWID is all about, because when you’re thinking and feeling good and focusing all your attention on what you want, things just seem to happen to bring that desire into being.

Except when it doesn’t!

Which is when we start to use the fantasy not as a jumping off point for the life we want to lead, as the person we most want to show up as but instead we use it to avoid our current reality and stay lost in our thoughts, losing sight of where we currently are and what needs to change.

And fantasy can be harmful, we have seen it happen only recently with QAnon and Trump and 5G and Covid.

Fantasy can offer an outlet for feelings we feel we have to repress in this world, and so the anger and fear that fuels the QAnon fantasy makes sense, as it does for the 5G and Covid conspiracies. People are afraid and angry, the situation the world finds itself in feels out of our control and unable to express those emotions in this reality, they find one or create one where they can give vent to their anger in full voice.

But on a personal level, often when we want to make change but are afraid of it, we sometimes set big, crazy goals that we have no idea how we can accomplish which can be discouraging. Now setting big hairy scary goals can be a good thing when we allow it to inspire our thinking as we stay grounded in our present circumstance in this moment.

Where this gets tricky is when we live in that fantasy as though its already happened and we become future obsessed about living that dream, and when we come back to our current circumstances we feel frustrated, afraid we’re never going to make it happen and of course that feeling, those thoughts then dominate our thinking and all positive momentum dissipates.

The trick is to aim for that big hairy scary goal and not wait for the monumental change to occur but take small action every day in the right direction to making it happen.

Say you want to be a millionaire, certainly think about having that amount of money and what all you’d do with it but don’t get lost in that fantasy. Instead start looking for ways to earn more money today, a part time job or selling a skill you have. And start saving and investing what you can every week/month so you build a habit of always putting money out of reach for that proverbial rainy day. And surely as day follows night, it will build.

Or say you want to fall in love. Don’t fixate on that person who has already told you they’re not interested. Instead think of all the ideal qualities your perfect mate would embody and be the person who would attract that ideal. Do you need to improve your personal hygiene, be better groomed, be friendlier, gentler, nicer? Then be that and notice how many more people start to notice you and want to be with you.

There’s nothing wrong with fantasy, as with everything, its in how you use it.

Whatever your fantasy is to be fully fit and healthy, to have a thriving business, be a published best selling author, have a loving family…you know yours, don’t you?

Then indulge in it every day, absolutely for sure and then use it to fuel you in making the changes you need to make to bring it into reality.

And as for the lottery win? Well, always make sure you buy a ticket because someone somewhere wins it, don’t they?

Love,

Cynthia xx

I’ve completely reworked my Change for Life program and its now Being the Best Me. A 12 week 1:1 highly personalised HypnoTherapyCoaching offer designed to take you from being unhappy, miserable and not sure of who you are anymore to being fully reconnected to the truth of your brilliance, magnificence and humanity.

Interested? Email or message me to find out more. Space are limited as I can only work with so many people at one time. Be one of those who truly makes their life different this year.