I know. It’s the thing that trips us up the most.
We’ve decided.
We’re changing.
Nothing’s going to stop us.
This time will be different.
And we’re all fired up. Fully committed. All in.
And a day later, or a week or a month, when we’ve kinda forgotten how bad we felt before we decided to change, its not so much a problem and you know, it wasn’t so bad and it’s okay if I do this or don’t do that.
And we just don’t feel like it anymore.
Doesn’t matter whether its a diet or a fitness plan or studying for a new career or creating more money or stopping gambling or drinking or porn or whatever.
We just fall back into the old stuff.
Doesn’t even matter if it’s killing us.
We just fall back into the old behaviours and ways of thinking and doing and being.
Because we don’t feel like making the effort to do the new thing, or the even bigger effort of not doing the old thing.
Just because we don’t feel like it.
Why?
Because motivation isn’t enough. Will power will always run out.
Nothing is more powerful than emotion. Than feelings. Than us.
Nothing can get us to do or not do something if we don’t want to do it.
So how do we get to the end result we want?
Other people do it. Other people change and keep growing and changing and we all want to be like that. They make it look easy.
Here’s the secret: its NOT easy. Not even for them!
But there’s a second part to the secret. They do it anyway!
Even when they’re not feeling like it. They do it.
Why?
Because they know how they’ll feel once they’ve done it or not done it.
Picture yourself in the grip of cravings, no matter what for. You know as soon as you give in, the cravings will ease but you’ll start to feel crap for having given in. Guilt, shame, and maybe even physical reactions.
I remember when I used to get cravings to eat crap food and I’d refuse for hours and then give in and order a takeaway. And as soon as the order was placed, the cravings would go away. The guilt, the shame, the feeling of being pathetic in not being able to say no would hit even before the food would arrive and I’d choke those feelings down along with the food.
These days, I rarely get cravings for takeaway because I did stop eating them. But I still get cravings for chocolate and bread, and it’s the same thing. Those cravings hit and I go mental and forget that I want to be healthier and thinner and depending on how I feel, I can eat everything in the house and still not feel satisfied because its not chocolate.
My clients often find the same, it’s not the giving up or not doing that’s hard. It’s the keeping going when you don’t feel like it.
But then look deeper. What are the cravings hiding? What’s beneath/behind them? What are you avoiding or resisting looking at and dealing with?
And if you still don’t want to look at that, then do this. Think about how you want to feel in an hour’s time. In a day’s time.
You may not want to study now or work out or take a walk but imagine you do that rather than give in to your cravings.
Imagine how you’ll feel?
What are those feelings?
Pride in yourself, sense of accomplishment, victory, determination. The feeling of doing right for yourself, keeping your promises to yourself, gratitude, strength, and even peace. Peace from the cravings, and peace from your inner self destructive demon.
Those feelings are stronger than ‘not feeling like it.’
That’s how you get yourself to do something you think you don’t want to. By refusing to be influenced by that imp and instead giving yourself all the good feelings that lift you up, inspire you to keep going.
Getting out from under the influence of bad habits of thinking is a power game and you have to build a team that wants to win.
To do that, you need to recruit the star players and in feelings; love, joy, happiness are the big league hitters. That’s the end of my sports analogies because I’m not good at them! 😉
What motivates you most is love. Act with love for yourself. Loving yourself comes first. ALWAYS.
‘Not feeling like it’ is a fear based feeling. And of course, when you’re tired, or haven’t taken care of your physical, mental and emotional needs, you’re going to be more vulnerable to this.
Loving Yourself First means taking care of yourself first too. Eating right, staying hydrated, exercise, sleep.
Change is easier when you’re well rested, relaxed and feeling good.
Loving yourself will help you stay on course. Because you decided to change because you needed to. That decision was an act of love. For yourself. Following through on it and making it happen is too.
Remember your daily non-negotiables. What are the 3-5 things you must do everyday to move you forward physically, mentally, emotionally, financially, spiritually? Make them part of your identity. Become a person who does those things without question.
Support yourself in changing. You can’t win in a fight with yourself. So bring every part of yourself onboard with change by focusing on how you’ll feel when you move forward. That’s the most powerful motivation of all.
Love,
Cynthia xx
PS. Below you’ll learn more about how I can support you in your healing journey.
Think what would life be like if your thought processes were upgraded so you became unstoppable. What would life be like if you were able to step up and show up as that best ever version of you that you know you’re capable of?
Picture yourself thriving in life, developing an instinct for making the right choices, knowing in your gut you’re always choosing the correct thing for you.
Imagine any addictions, old anxiety and fear melting away, no longer influencing your thinking, your behaviour, your decisions. You are free to make better choices.
Think how it would feel achieving your goals with far less resistance, whether it’s earning an extraordinary income, being a rockstar in your business or career, or excelling in your personal relationships. You can do it, you have no fears about any of it anymore.
See yourself fully present and grounded, living with total fulfillment and satisfaction with how life is unfolding for you, with zero regrets, as you fearlessly carve your own path forward.
Want this now? Check out this page and get in touch to get started on living your ideal life today. Or simply take the product tour to find out more.
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