In, out, in, out, this coronavirus hokey cokey is the worst ever!

I thought I’d get used to the idea of the adaptations we need to make to how we live in order to adapt to life with Coronavirus in our world.

Certainly, Boris and Co. made it seem like ‘normal’ life was within reach, albeit with a few behavioural alterations, washing hands regularly, wearing a mask in populated areas, and keeping our distance from each other.

But it doesn’t seem like that’s possible, that there is a way to live with this Virus and resume almost ‘normal’ living conditions. Spikes of infection around the country would certainly suggest otherwise.

And the anxiety I’m feeling is different this time round. At the beginning, while the idea of the virus and the government’s blunt messaging was terrifying and overwhelming, there was comfort to be found in the thought that we were all in this together, all following the same rules, all experiencing the same restrictions and all of us grateful beyond belief to those who kept working throughout to enable us to live comfortably; the shop workers, the council workers, care home workers and of course all who worked in the NHS.

But this time, the anxiety is much more isolating and personalised, it really feels like I’m in this by myself, that it’s every person for themselves. That we’re all alone trying to find our own way through; the disaster that is the UK government the thing we’re least able to reply on for considered, safe guidance and support.

The messaging from Government has been woefully inadequate from the start, actually its been worse than that, it’s been farcical and incompetent, not to mention downright insulting. How dare Matt Hancock and his cohorts blame people for the spike rises in numbers affected, how dare he tell us it’s our fault for not social distancing properly?

Has he been watching what the UK government has been doing throughout this crisis; the complacency, the disregard for facts, the lack of urgency and clarity.

Late into lockdown by at least two weeks, too early out of it. Advisors swanning about the country ignoring the rules, clashing advice such as one minister saying masks aren’t necessary only for Boris to make it law to wear one later the same day!

It safe to go to work but not visit family. Safe to go to school but not play with friends at home.

F*CK OFF!

Boris and Co. have been a complete disaster. If the country were a company, the share price would have fallen through the floor, productivity at a standstill and the shareholders (us) would be demanding the board (them) quit with immediate effect.

Instead we have 4 more years of this incredible sh!tshow to get through.

So, leaving Boris to his own devices, God helps us – anxiety- what to do to reduce our feelings of panic, fear and confusion?

Firstly, find people who empathise with you, safely of course. Call a friend, Zoom or Facetime them so you can see each other’s faces, or visit and stand 2 metres apart. And if you don’t want to speak to someone you know, call a helpline, a support line of one of the mental health charities or the Samaritans.

Whatever you do, don’t bottle it up, speak to someone who will give you the time and space to voice your fears, vent your anger and frustration, express your feelings. And equally give them space and time to soothe you, not always with words but by simply being with you in the moment and supporting you through it.

This is a time of massive uncertainty and fear and humans don’t do well with uncertainty. We all need comfort and to find as much certainty as we can in this volatile global crisis.

Our autonomic nervous system hates uncertainty, so give yourself the benefit of a structure based on what you can do right now. Go to bed at the same time, get up at the same time.

Create a timetable for yourself. I did and it helps so much. I am no longer wasting hours on news sites scaring myself silly because I’ve scheduled my day into 50 minutes blocks with ten minutes between every block for stretching, doing a yoga pose or simply taking a break to look out the window or play with Amelia.

Usually we find comfort in being with other people, that’s an evolved biological need. Isolation is not our natural state but unfortunately, social comfort is not accessible due to Covid-19.

But you do what you can. I spend longer talking to the people we meet on our walks, I need that conversation, that connection with them and I know the people I talk to need it too. Find you own way of connecting safely with others.

I just went round to my next door neighbours and spent some time talking to her, properly social distanced, outside in the open air. Simply checking in, making sure she’s okay.

If you can’t reach out for yourself, do it for someone else.

We’re all fed up, we’re all annoyed, and we all still need to be very careful.

I don’t know the truth of what Coronavirus is. I’ve seen some of the theories, and there are a few so wacky and out there, I couldn’t get my head round them at all. Others, others are more plausible, some I’m half open to believing but regardless of all of that, I want to live.

I want to live. I want you to live. I want us all to live and create a better. more honest, open and decent society from here on. I want us to respect the natural world as much as the concrete and steel pillars we raise to the sky. I want us to see that when there is grinding poverty and deprivation we are all diminished. I want to see wealth distribution because when so much wealth is concentrated in the hands of so few men, its just plain wrong.

But I digress – anxiety and depression – they are a real concern right now and should be considered as dangerous as Covid-19.

Reach out for help if you’re struggling, Make a call, cry, scream to get someone’s attention. And if you can’t do it for yourself, do it for someone else. Because the world needs you.

Don’t drown in the darkness, there is always light. Always.

We can get through this together, because regardless of some of the world’s worst leaders and governments in decades, most of us care about each other.

We are all human, We are one humanity. this is it, we are it. All of us. Together – no separation. Hold tight- because I don’t know but I believe it will all work out okay.

Love,

Cynthia xx

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