Its okay to not be okay but you also need to do something about it

Some days you’re going to feel bad.

Some days you’re going to feel sad.

Some days you’re going to feel like it’s all just too much and you can’t face going on anymore.

Some days are just going to suck!

 

What do you do?

Don’t put a sticking plaster on it. 

Don’t pretend everything is okay when it isn’t.

Don’t try and push yourself to get on with things when you’re fighting just to stay calm, to stay in one piece.

Don’t ignore what you’re feeling.

 

Sit.

Be still.

Name it.

What are you feeling?

Terror that you’re not going to solve your problems? 

Afraid everything is falling apart and you along with it?

Ashamed your financial problems will be forced out into the open and you’ll be homeless and hopeless?

 

What are you feeling? Name it.

Where are those feelings coming from? Locate them in your body.

Where are they held in your body? What sensations are they creating?

How do they move through your body?

What does this remind you of?

 

Can you see it, feel it, name it?

 

Get in touch with what you’re feeling and sit in it. 

Be still. Don’t ignore or distract or pretend it away.

 

See it, name it, acknowledge it.

What is it there for? What purpose does this feeling have?

What is it reminding you of that once happened that made you feel unsure, unsafe?

 

Don’t remember the event if you don’t want to, just acknowledge that for some reason whatever you’re going through now has triggered the same feelings inside of you as this past trauma.

 

Sit in this moment now.

See the room you are in.

Feel the air moving in and through you with every breath.

Notice the sensation of the clothes you are wearing against your skin.

 

If you have someone you can talk to, talk to them honestly and openly about how you’re feeling. Ask them not to give you solutions or tell you it’s all going to be okay, but to simply listen, to hear you, to support you.

If you are on your own, and you feel able to do so, reach out to one of the charities that are there to support people like us; fragile, sensitive, and struggling having been strong for so long.

If you have no-one you can talk to, talk to yourself. Not the critical, harsh words you learned from people who didn’t understand or value you, but love words. The kind, appreciative, supporting, loving words you long to hear.

 

Covid 19, the lockdowns and the engendered fear have powered the exponential growth of something that was already a devastating problem: loneliness.

 

And that’s made so much worse when you feel unworthy of love, of attention and affection.

 

So today, right now, I want you to start a practice of waking up and saying to yourself ‘I love myself, I love my life.’ Over and over again.

 

When you’re brushing your teeth, look into the eyes of your reflection and tell yourself, ‘I love you, I love you so much.’

 

When you’re out driving or getting the bus, when you have a moment to sit and be still, say it again, ‘I love myself, I love my life.’

 

When you’re feeling out of it, lost and alone, recognise what you’re feeling, honour it because it comes from within and then say, ‘I love myself, I love my life, even when I feel like this, I love myself.’

 

Allow yourself to receive what you need from you.  Because you need to love yourself, whether there’s a crowd surrounding you telling you they love you or you’re alone. You can’t receive the love of others if you are unable to receive love from yourself.

 

I know it’s overwhelming right now. Vaccine or not, the world is a cold, scary place and there’s lots to be wary of, but equally there’s beauty and warmth and joy in this world. We see what we believe to be in front of our eyes.

 

When you say ‘I love myself, I love my life’ over and over, you start training yourself to think and feel differently, and you’ll start to notice different things in your world. And when you love yourself, you’ll find life isn’t so lonely, or scary or overwhelming.

 

Because you always have you. You always have love.

 

To all of us who struggle sometimes, take care and give yourself love every day.

 

Love,

Cynthia xx

PS. Please like, comment and share below is this message connected with you. I love to hear how my work lands with people. And also, stop messing around! If you’re reading this, you need me. Email or message me to see how best we can work together to give you what you need. It might be a list of free resources I offer, it might be a program or course that’s not too expensive or you might want to jump right in and fully commit to yourself with a personal 1:1 hypnotherapycoaching program. Whatever you need, I’ll work with you to guide you to gaining it all. That’s a promise xx