‘When you feel my heat
Look into my eyes
It’s where my demons hide
It’s where my demons hide
Don’t get too close
It’s dark inside
It’s where my demons hide’
I always thought my business was primarily for women. After all, I’m a woman, almost all my friends through all of my life have been women, I am incredibly close to my women friends and we talk, and have done for years about everything, big and small, intimate, personal, nothing’s too much ever.
I know women’s issues, I understand women’s pain, their frustration, the lack of opportunities, the feeling of being denied time and space to grow and make mistakes and still get the job simply because of your gender.
The anguish over physical and sexual assault and abuse, especially when it comes from someone you loved. The feelings of guilt and powerlessness because you ‘allowed’ it to happen because of your choices, what you wore, what you said, what you drank, because you choose to trust. All of that sh!t. I knew women because I’d faced most of their problems myself and I knew I could help them.
I didn’t think I understood men enough to get to the root of their issues and overcome them and honestly, I mostly thought men were the problem.
At the start of my business most of my clients were women but in the past 18 months an interesting shift has started. As I’ve been reading more feminist literature and books and understanding just how much men are also badly served by the patriarchal system, more and more men have been getting in touch, requesting my help.
And not just with surface level stuff. All these men wanted to go deep.
And I so honour them for that and I am so humbled by the stories I’ve been told.
Childhood trauma, in one case detailing some of the worst childhood abuse I’d ever heard, most expressing an inability to hold meaningful personal connections, to hold any real personal connection, anger and violence issues both as perpetrator and as victim to it, for many an inability to feel anything, a numbness of emotions and a need to always look outside of themselves for distraction using porn, sex, drugs, alcohol, gambling. All kinds of self destructive and self abusive behaviour.
I realised that men are just as trapped by the patriarchy and the behavioural norms expected by society, the defined gender roles as women are and those prescribed roles stop boys and men from being all of themselves.
And during the Coronavirus Crisis and Lockdown, this incredibly unsettling time in our world, with an unseen menace potentially threatening our lives and the lives of those we loved, threatening our livelihoods and the very systems that our economic lives are based on, men are becoming even more unsure of their place in the world.
Its difficult to stay stoic in the face of global uncertainty. Its almost impossible when faced with overwhelming personal insecurity and uncertainty.
The only thing each of us can do is face it, name it and admit that we don’t know what’s going to happen, and that’s scary and its okay to feel uncertain, scared and unsure. The only thing we can do is keep ourselves and those we love as safe as possible with the information we have right now.
And that’s what we all have to focus on. How to keep our mental, emotional, physical and spiritual selves in good shape now in this moment. Because no-one knows what comes next.
PS. Think what would life be like if your thought processes were upgraded so you became unstoppable. What would life be like if you were able to step up and show up as that best ever version of you that you know you’re capable of?
Picture yourself thriving in life, developing an instinct for making the right choices, knowing in your gut you’re always choosing the correct thing for you.
Imagine any addictions, old anxiety and fear melting away, no longer influencing your thinking, your behaviour, your decisions. You are free to make better choices.
Think how it would feel achieving your goals with far less resistance, whether it’s earning an extraordinary income, being a rockstar in your business or career, or excelling in your personal relationships. You can do it, you have no fears about any of it anymore.
See yourself fully present and grounded, living with total fulfillment and satisfaction with how life is unfolding for you, with zero regrets, as you fearlessly carve your own path forward.
Want this now? Check out this page and get in touch to get started on living your ideal life today.