Everyday you choose.
You choose who you’re going to be. You choose how you’re going to feel. You choose what you’re going to achieve.
You may not know you’re making these choices. But just because you don’t know it doesn’t mean you’re not doing it!
And if it’s not you, then who or what is deciding your life for you?
That’s an easy one to answer.
It’s your subconscious programming. All the lessons you learned as a child are now the rules by which you live your life.
What do I mean by that?
As a child, we have no ability to rationalise, to decide something makes sense, is true or not true. Instead we absorb the world around us as it impacts us, the child at its centre.
If your parents were always out working, you as a child may have decided they didn’t love you because you never saw them. Not true, but it makes sense from the point of view of a lonely, seemingly abandoned child.
If you saw your parents fighting over money, you will have maybe decided that money is a bad thing that always starts rows and you’ll find the same thing happening in your adult life, or you never talk about money for fear of starting a row.
If your parents were in any way unable to provide you with what you needed as a child, and human children need a lot of unconditional love, support, approval and attention that may of our parents weren’t emotionally grounded emough to do, then you’ll struggle with the lack of whatever you missed out on as a child.
What is more, you won’t even realise its just a story you made up as child.
For you, its truth. It is how the world is and everything in your life proves it.
Because we live what we expect to see in the world.
So how do you take back control from whatever programming is making your decisions for you?
How do you get to decide who you want to be, how you’re going to feel and what you’re going to achieve with full conscious awareness?
That’s the question isn’t it?
And the answer will change your life.
You have to step out of the hypnotic trance you are in right now. The trance you’ve been living for most of your life.
Take back control by recognising your subconscious programming and rejecting it, deleting it and writing and embedding new beliefs, new programming that gives you the life you want.
How do you do that?
By choosing it every day. By deciding this is who I am, the identity I want to show up as in the world, this is how I choose to feel, this is what I’m going to achieve.
And you do that every day, throughout the day.
Journaling is a great tool for this. Writing a full, detailed, sensory description of the life you want to live, the person you want to be every day and claiming it for yourself.
Everyday I write in my journal who I intend to be that day, how I intend to show up, the work I intend to do, the goals I intend to achieve. And no matter what I stick to my plan.
That’s the other thing you need as well as focus on what you want, you need the discipline to take the aligned action to bring it into being.
You can choose to allow yourself to be distracted by the television or read a book that will improve your intellect.
You can chose to eat the doughnut or an apple.
You can choose to have that extra drink or have a glass of water and go to bed.
Changing you life, changing your habits, changing everything starts inside your mind with changing your thoughts.
That’s all you have to do right now.
Change how you think.
Keep thinking differently and you’ll soon be ready to start doing things differently.
But you don’t have to start doing immediately.
You start by thinking. Changes in how you think will lead to changes in what you believe and how you see the world and how you see yourself.
Being fully immersed in this process means you get to create yourself, you carve yourself out of flesh and bone thought by thought. Instead of allowing randomly absorbed information and childish interpretations of your life events dictate your identity and life.
And people say, ‘That’s a lot of work.’
More work than being miserable and unhappy and doing nothing about it and expecting more of the same today, tomorrow and forever?
No. That’s hard work. Looking down the barrell of years and years and seeing nothing but the same old life getting progressively worse as the comfort zone shrinks.
Every day deciding to be the best version of me, writing out what that looks like, the work I want to do, the life I want to live. That is amazing. I get to play in my imagination and through attention, focus and intention, make it happen.
I decide every day how that day will be. And of course, there are events and happenings that bounce me out of the discipline of staying aligned to my choices, and that’s when you get to decide again. Who am I? How do I deal with this? What do I intend from this situation?
For me, everything always works out for my highest good, no matter what.
That’s ingrained in me now.
As strong a part of my identity as being from Derry.
Which changed from being from Londonderry. See, you can change anything! (A joke only natives of Derry/Londonderry might get!)
Everything can change when you do the work.
And it is a daily practice. Just as your addiction or bad habits are a daily practice, so to is deciding to be amazing.
Just decide and live into it every day by thinking it all the time…I am amazing.
I decide today is going to be a great day for me.
Today I am going to love my life.
I am going to show up as my best self all day long.
Does this immediately change your physical reality?
No, of course not.
What it does it allow you to see new possibilities, new opportunities, new ways for you to improve your life and for things to get better and keep on getting better.
It starts with a thought.
And yes, often that is enough.
Because changing how you think is hard work.
Every single client of mine has said that to me at some point in our work together – this is harder than I thought it would be. This is hard, period.
But if you want to be different, its where you start.
And not one of them would stop doing the work now, none of them ever want to go back to the way they were.
And remember don’t rush into physical activity, into doing something different as jumping straight into doing usually leads to frustration and overwhelm and eventually quitting and then you believe you can’t change.
Don’t rush to the physical too soon.
Think the changes into being.
When you’re ready, the right action for you to take will reveal itself.
But for now, go daydream, who do you want to be? How do you want to live? What would a day in your ideal life look like?
And if you’re ready now, get in touch. Message or email me to discuss my Change for Life program and how it will work for you.
And if you’re not ready yet to make that investment in yourself. purchase Winter WonderMind, it is chocful of fantastic exercises and audios to direct you on how to live your best possible life.
Decide today who you want to be and make it happen.