What we do, what we feel, what we experience in our lives is determined by our beliefs.
Our beliefs about ourselves, who we are, what we are worth, what we are deserving of.
Our beliefs about other people; whether or not there are good people in the world, people who will support us and encourage us.
Our beliefs about life itself. Whether we think life is a struggle, it’s not fair, it’s hard for people like us or that life is amazing, full of opportunities for us to do good and feel good.
Our beliefs set the heights to which we can experience life in all areas: relationships, work, money, health, success. The beliefs we have also set the boundary on the lows we will encounter and endure.
If you want to change your life, then you first have to change what you believe about yourself and what’s possible for you. Reset your inner thermostat for that area you want and need change in.
As a hypnotherapist, my role isn’t to give you advice on how to solve your problems. There are enough people doing that. No, my job is to assist you in solving your own problems by changing your beliefs. By encouraging you in growing bigger in how you think and feel and experience life so you outgrow those old beliefs and they no longer fit the person you’ve become.
How do you make the shift to define yourself in such a way that you go from here – where you are unhappy and dissatisfied with yourself and life to there – where you are fulfilled, energised and moving forward to the future you always dreamed about but didn’t really believe was possible?
Motivation is actually the easiest part of this. We all have lots of motivation to change. The difficulty is in both keeping up your motivation day after day and translating it into action and following through on what you want with the action required to bring it into being.
How do you make that happen? More motivation? Will Power?
A more effective method of change, rather than trying to force it, is to remove the beliefs you have that are getting in the way of successfully creating the changes you want.
What if the obstacles to what you want just disappear?
Right now, are you waking up most days feeling blue, low, a bit let down by yourself and life? Maybe even anxious or depressed as you think of the day ahead and the one after that and after that and so on.
Feeling tired, lethargic, unable to find the energy to get on with the things you need to do to effect the changes you want in this life?
Maybe you feel angry too much of the time? And that saps all your energy, or you spend your energy suppressing your anger and feeling it burn inside of you, with all the should have, could have but didn’t scenarios running around your brain?
Think of those days you promised yourself you’d eat right and yet you find yourself having something outrageously bad for you for breakfast. Another broken promise to yourself as you smash that impulse to do right by your body’s needs.
Same with exercise; you swear this time you’ll come home from work and do twenty minutes on the exercise bike or treadmill or go for a fast, longer walk than normal and yet you come in and swerve straight to the sofa and switch on the tv.
And maybe for you its not diet or exercise, maybe you have promised yourself that this is the year you finally start that business you always wanted or get that qualification, promotion, transfer.
Whatever it is, instead of writing that email, studying your textbooks, practising and promoting yourself, you do none of the things you know you should do to achieve that goal and keep that promise.
Look, you’re not alone, The reason I can point to so many examples with ease (and I could have easily talked about a dozen more) is that this is what we do. Human beings, gifted with such profound intelligence and we use it to make ourselves miserable.
Most people don’t accomplish what they want to. It really is difficult to start a new project and initiate that change and even more so to sustain it.
And its not lack of motivation, after all every dieter is always ready to start again. Its not lack of commitment, thousands of pounds are spent every year on self development courses, training programmes, books and seminars and yet the wheels keep spinning in place.
The problem is the inability to create a change of behaviour and thinking and to sustain changes so they become not simply long term but permanent.
Its time to start looking to create the possibilities and circumstances for change to occur. To provide a support structure to nurture yourself through change and live into and adapt to it whilst guarding against falling back into old ways of thinking and behaving.
Recreate yourself by reconnecting to the truth of who you are.You want what you want for a reason, its not random.
Eliminate the beliefs that cause you to behave in self defeating, self destructive, hopeless ways.
Remove the old ways of thinking that limited you ability to change.
Reconnect to your true self, to the version of you that doesn’t have all that garbage and those old stories, lies, false beliefs dragging you down.
Face the beliefs that have stopped you. Use a reframe tool like Bryon Karie’s and ask if its really true. Of course it isn’t. Reframe how you think and then when you hit a dead end or have a bad day (and you will) you don’t get to say, ‘this isn’t going to work for me’ instead you reimagine your dream, you visualise that best version of you and you give it another go.
If not this way, then there’s another way. Keep holding the image of that best version of you and those goals, dreams and ideas you want to make happen and you keep doing something different to make it happen until you bring it to life.
Sometimes I forget who I want to be, that best version of myself that shines in my mind’s eye. She, of flowing hair, glowy skin, healthy body, strong mind. She, who does work she loves, impacts thousands of people, is disciplined in her daily practice of self care and self love, eating right, drinking lots of water, meditating, journaling. She, who is deeply connected to her soul, her Higher Self and to Source, she, for whom everything flows so easily.
Why does everything flow so easily for her? Because everyday she does all the things she needs to do and she gets out of her own way.
That’s so important and that’s what I forget. I have to do the work regardless of how I feel, regardless of the circumstances that are in front of me. I forget this every time.
I get disappointed that someone I put lots of effort, time, energy and belief into doesn’t sign up as a client. And I forget.
I worry about money and I forget.
I eat too much or eat the wrong food and I forget.
I slump in front of the tv rather than write my journal and I forget.
I forget that what I want, wants me. That the energy I put out into the world is what attracts what I need and what I want and all I have to do is keep doing the work, regardless of circumstance, regardless of how I feel. I do the work and I believe and I trust that what I want will show up.
I know that we all seek a miracle pill. something that will make that change easy, painless, effortless.
Yet the change that matters, and the change that makes me feel good, the change that works is doing the work while holding the vision of what we want and living into it.
Do the work, both the actual work required to bring your dream to life and the work of erasing those old beliefs that hold you down. Do the work of holding the vision of the best version of you living the life you want.
We do the work every day and that ideal version of ourselves becomes more real, that ideal life gets closer and closer.
What can you do today to get back on track with being that best version of yourself?
For me, I pulled out my journal and started writing, I did some hypnosis research and training and practised some energy healing and I wrote and shared my getting back to self post with you.
We fall back, that’s what we do, unfortunately it seems to be part of being human. However, it’s the mark of the person you are in the process of becoming that you stop, reorient yourself and restart.
Keep on keeping on
PS. I am relaunching ‘Loving Yourself Comes First’ in mid January, date to be confirmed. This course is going to blow you wide open to love, to knowing yourself and caring for yourself and putting your needs first.
21 days of video, audio, articles, journaling and hypnomeditations to get over your doubts and fears and reconnect back to you.
And if you say, I can’t possibly do that, I have to look after this and that and them first. Let me tell you, you’ll look after them better once you’ve done this course because you’ll have learned how to take care of your needs, and be free then to give them more of what’s left.
Loving Yourself Comes First – You know it’s true. Pm me if you’re interested and I’ll follow up with more details